Sunday, April 17, 2011

The Great Sin

I had a friend tell me that he immediately thought of me when he saw this clip. He thought I should go watch it.

I watch the video...I score pretty high on the pride test. As much as my spirit flinched when I was told this test brought me to mind, I knew I would fail any test on pride.
I don't want it to be an issue, but I know this is a huge struggle for me. 
CS Lewis has some great words about The Great Sin

So many aspects of my personality and mannerisms are competitive, full of debate, and intense. I know that I'm prideful. I get mad at myself when I start getting super competitive, then friends/family can tell I'm worked up and assume I'm even more into winning than normal (that's a big amount). It's a slippery slope. 

My biggest fear: embarrassment
Games I hate: charades, acting/singing in front of others unless it's worship music
My safety net: jokes or making fun of myself so no one else can first
At the core, my fears and my quirks are rooted in not wanting to look dumb. I want to appear put together. I don't want to feel stupid. If I truly believed and lived in the belief that Christ was all, the opinion of those around me wouldn't hold such merit in my everyday life.

As I study the humility of Christ, I see how far from that I am. I see that my pride is ugly. The core of me is utter depravity. I need Jesus more than ever. Oh that I would set my pride aside, humble myself, and ask God to do a mighty change in me. That I would recognize that my pride shames the Gospel. That the glory of God and wishing to honor Him with everything would be my motivation to surrender my great sin to the Lord. 
To be bold FOR JESUS. 
To seek attention FOR THE CROSS OF CHRIST.

Call me out. Help me wage war against myself.


  1. Thank you Anna doll for your authenticity. Excellent post and video.....

    Ouch! I fail the pride test too. By the grace of God I stand forgiven. Step by step I am in the process of becoming the woman the Lord Jesus has designed me to be. I love you dear one. Mom

  2. Amen! Thanks for that honest and painful post and video. I could have written much of it about myself. God shows us things in us that are not like Him so that we are aware of how much we need Him to save us. I often cry out for God to save me from myself and keep on loving me. He always lets me run to Him and hide: Ps 17:8. It is only in Him that I can be free from my messiness. Keep using the Sword of the Spirit to shoot down "The Great Sin".