My Someday List

I was recently asked if I had a list of things I wanted to do before I turn 30. I kind of stuttered a bit-- I dream big dreams, but had I ever really put a timeline on any of them?

This is a glimpse into some of the things I hope to do...someday.

1. See a Symphony performance in Vienna
2. Go sailing (bonus points if the sailing trip involves overnights on the boat)
3. Go on a weekend group bike ride with my dad and my sister. Or one with my dad. And then also one eventually with just my sister.
4. Take adult piano lessons
5. Go to an Opera at the Met in NYC
6. Worship with people in a third world country
7. Host an epic fancy dinner party
8. Experience Carnival in Brazil
9. Go skiing in real mountains (No, I don't think skiing in Minnesota counts)
10. Wine tour (top choices: Europe, Chile, South Africa, or Cali)
11. Give an anonymous gift that changes someone's life
12. Have kids- biological and/or through adoption
13. Hear Handel's Messiah performed well.
14. Write a book and get it published.
15. See the Pacific NW
16. Learn how to shoot a gun so I'm no longer afraid of them.
17. Memorize Ephesians 1, Romans 8, and Isaiah 35
18. Take some kind of cooking class
19. See the tulips and windmills in Holland
20. Do a Fall driving tour on the east coast to see the leaves and eat lots of seafood
21. Make and decorate a gingerbread house from scratch
22. Make a queen-sized quilt that I'm proud of
23. Attempt to like/enjoy golf or tennis (also involves finding a patient and kind teacher or friend to help!)
24. Learn what all of the referee signals in football mean
25. Go on a hot air balloon ride
26. Learn how to grill a perfect medium rare steak.
27. Visit Spain--Barcelona in particular
28. Overcome my fear of horses
29. Do a food, wine, and culture tour of Italy. Really see the country -- if I could make it for one of the Opera Festivals, that would be even more amazing. And hiking? I'd do that too. Especially if I could drink wine during the breaks.
30. Learn how to slalom water ski
31. Learn how to make homemade croissants and tarts.
32. See the white cliffs of Dover

The Uncommon Marvel

I've recently become more and  more aware that there's a certain amount of faith required to be a single woman in the conservative dating scene. As I chit chat with female friends who are in various stages of the scene  -- we concur. Waiting stinks.

Don't get me wrong -- every female has an obligation to let a guy know that she'd be okay with him mayyybe asking her out. You know - that subtle hint that she's giving him the "green light". YET - there's the waiting. The meandering around and moving on with life while we wait for him to take notice or initiate or pursue. Waiting for the uncommon marvel: the "ask".

Scenario one - the green light the girl is attempting to give off is coming across as more LIME GREEN or NEON ORANGE and scary/needy to the guy - guy avoids. girl waits (and probably pines unhealthily).

Scenario two - the green light is marred by an awkward friend comment by one of the two parties involved, or even worse -- an outside party- guy avoids, girl waits or also avoids. 

Scenario three - the green light is pleasantly ignored - the guy is not interested. The girl waits and then hopefully moves on (depending on the attachment level - this realization can take a while. What can I say - some females are very adept at dreaming and not so adept at facing reality). 

Scenario four - the green light is acknowledged and the guy pursues - GUY ASKS GIRL OUT! WOOHOOOO! Girl is thrilled.

Next step: 

The Date (or hangout, or awkward encounter. FYI for the guys -- the girl wants a date. A real date. She wants you to preferably call (not facebook or tweet or text) and say - Hi _____(her name here). This is ______(guy's name here). I'm interested in getting to know you more and taking you out on a date. I thought we could go to_____(fill in activity). Would you be up for that? Can I pick you up? ) 

 Moving on with the scenario: 

 - Scenario one -  Date is super. She lets him know she had a great time. Maybe a text (mayybe). And she waits. Waits for him to lead out. Waits for him to follow up. Waits for him to signal that he also had a great time. She avoids being needy. Avoids getting too attached. WAITS. 

- Scenario two - Date is so so, date is horrible, or date is just awkward. Start pattern again, don't pass go, don't collect a diamond, don't change your facebook relationship status. Consider joining a new online dating program to fill in the waiting or at least entertain yourself during the process. 

The waiting is so hard. This reality of first and foremost - pursuing CHRIST. Resting in HIS pursuit. Finding intimacy in His word and His promises. All the while - knowing that you do want to someday be in a relationship. Sometimes pretending you don't care. Inside - you do. You want it, but you force the smile every time someone asks -- SOO are you SEEING ANYONE?! Or you politely say -- not currently! Or perhaps frighten them by saying you are browsing the inter webs for the next potential! Or even more boldly - nope, I'm up for blind dates, though!

Once the possibility arises and maybe a date has happened --  finding the balance between affirming this gent, yet letting him pursue. Trying to figure out the "code" of interest. Or do I just pay attention to movies like He's just not that into you? If he's interested -- I'll KNOW.

I hate the code. Screw the code.  Waiting is hard.

BRAVO to the guys out there that are willing to risk. Willing to face the possibility of rejection. Willing to be one of the few single men that will genuinely ask a girl out on a real date. Not friend-card awkwardly sliding towards late night hangouts alone after group sessions. No - taking the time to plan, take her out, and get to know her intentionally. It means a ton. It shows her she has value. It sets a precedent for future beaus. So - yes. I see you out there. I applaud you. Keep it up.

My First Car Accident

FRIENDS. FOOTBALL. BARBEQUE. CRASH. SIRENS. 

Yup. I hit a girl in a black honda with my trusty Malibu. Total accident. Totally my fault. I didn't see her as I was pulling out of a parking lot after a post-game barbeque. My car now has some sweet scratches/dents on the left front AND my door makes an awesome sound when I open it.

 I got a ticket. I get to send the accident report to my insurance. My first accident (other than scraping my own car on the garage) since starting to drive at 16.

Fortunately, no one was hurt. Both of us were not thrilled with the predicament, BUT the police officer (His name was Brad) was very nice. Not exactly how I wanted to spend my "extra paycheck" from the month of August. Oh well. I was able to drive away. I'm thankful!